职场4大致命“黑洞”

Q168

不懂感恩

    别人为你提供帮助的时候，向对方的努力表示感谢非常重要。当然，你可以当时就向对方表达谢意，也可以把对方的好意记在心里，指导自己未来的行为。例如，你请求别人帮忙进行社交推介，一定要让联系人知道最后的结果如何。不论你做什么，千万不能请求他人为你牵线搭桥，却在安排初次会面的时候犯错误。


    帕姆•索西在担任蒙哥马利郡教育委员会（Literacy Council of Montgomery County）常务主任时，一位下属的朋友游说她启动一个新项目。项目将由那位下属的朋友负责。索西回忆说：“我必须新增加一个岗位，还得想办法解决这个岗位的工资问题。她确实在非常卖力地推介，搞得我不得不申请许可，还在原本就已经很狭窄的办公室里给她腾出了一块地方。”

Forgetting to say thank you

    When someone does you a favor, it's important to acknowledge the effort. Of course, you should thank the person at the moment, but also keep the favor in mind as a guide for your future behavior. For instance, if you ask for a networking introduction, be sure to let your contact know how it turns out. Whatever you do, don't ask for an introduction and then drop the ball in setting up an initial meeting.


    When Pam Saussy was executive director of the Literacy Council of Montgomery County, a friend of one of her employees lobbied for Saussy to launch a new program that the friend would run. "I had to create a position and figure out how to carve out some pay for it," Saussy recalls. "She really sold it hard, and I had to get permission and find a place for her in a tight office."

Q168

然而，两个月不到，那位员工就放弃了这份“梦幻工作”。其实，早在几个月之前，这个项目当时还在筹备，而索西也还没有同意为她专门设立一个岗位的时候，她就已经有了这样的打算。这就是忘恩负义。


    要寻找各种方式对同事的努力表示感谢，哪怕是通过一些间接的方法。高管教练米歇尔•弗里德曼就曾帮助一位客户，将360度绩效评估中的负面同级反馈变成个人成长和加深职场人际关系的一次机会。


    弗里德曼回忆称：“她把同事的反馈看成一次机会，用来对同事说：‘感谢你花时间填写调查表，提出意见。我认真考虑过你说的话，希望能与你交流一下如何让我们的合作更加融洽。’”

Barely two months later, the employee quit to take her "dream job" at the State Department, a move that had been in the works for months -- long before Saussy agreed to create a position for her. Talk about ingratitude.


    Look for ways to appreciate your colleagues' efforts, even when it might not be obvious. Executive coach Michelle Friedman helped a client turn negative peer feedback from a 360-degree review into a chance for personal growth and deeper workplace relationships.


    "She used it as an opportunity to go back to them and say, 'Thank you for investing the time in filling out the survey and writing comments. I've thought about what you said, and I'd love to talk about ways we can work together better,' " recalls Friedman.

Q168

粗心大意

    与技术有关的工作失误恐怕能写成一本厚书。比如最常见的是，在电子邮件中滥用“回复全部”，或者把电子邮件错发给了不相关的人，因为邮件程序自动填充了一个错误的地址。


    召开电话会议的时候，不要指望静音键能够掩盖你在做其他事情的事实，也不能掩盖你的冷嘲热讽。就像政客们会假设麦克风始终处在开启状态一样，你也应该提醒自己，任何电话通话都是双向的，尽量避免低声发牢骚。

Tech disasters

    An entire book could be written about the work blunders related to technology. There's the infamous abuse of "reply all" on email, or sending email to the wrong person because your mail program automatically filled in a mistaken address.


    When it comes to conference calls, don't rely on the mute button to cover your multitasking or snide comments. Just as politicians assume that any microphone is live, you should assume that any telephone call is two-way, and resist under-your-breath muttering.

Q168

如果一小组参会人员计划在电话会议结束之后继续交流，一定要断开连接，然后重新发起一次通话，以免无意当中被其他人偷听。首先，要确保自己清楚参与讨论的都有谁。硅谷猎头、《职场登顶战略》（Getting to the Top: Strategies for Career Success）一书的作者凯瑟琳•乌尔里克说：“如果是在参加虚拟电话会议，目的是汇报一个大型项目的情况和明确接下来需要改进的地方，在不知道与会人员都有谁的情况下，不要指责某个人的糟糕表现。”


    最好不要事事依靠电子邮件：要愿意拿起电话，或者亲自拜访，这样才能建立起更稳固的关系。


    一定要理解同事和客户如何看待你对科技的使用。高管培训公司Next Step Partners的培训师迈克尔•梅尔彻认为：“比如说，你正在与某人见面。这时，你的电话响了，你看了一眼。凡是30岁以上的人对此肯定会出现非常显著的负面反应。而且对方会根据自己的标准对你进行评判。而当今的天下依然是“老家伙们”主导的世界，所以一个小动作都会成为你自己的绊脚石。”  
If a smaller group of participants plans to continue speaking after a big conference call ends, make a point of disconnecting and initiating a new call so there are no inadvertent eavesdroppers. For that matter, be sure you know who is listening in the first place. "If you are in a virtual conference call debriefing a large project and pointing out what needs to be done better next time, watch to not point out individual poor performance if you don't know who is in the room," advises Kathryn Ullrich, a Silicon Valley-based recruiter and author of Getting to the Top: Strategies for Career Success.


    It's best not to hide behind email: Be willing to pick up a phone or meet in person so you can build stronger relationships.


    Make sure you understand how colleagues and clients perceive your use of technology. "Say you're having a meeting with somebody and your phone goes off and you look at it. Anybody over 30 would have a dramatic negative response to that," says Michael Melcher, an executive coach with the firm Next Step Partners. "You're going to be judged by that other person's standards. Since older people still rule, you're going to be hampered by that."  

Q168

无视别人

    糟糕的职场倾听者不在少数。许多人在开会和打电话的时候喋喋不休，根本没有考虑其他人的观点，或者根本注意不到他们的信息被当作了耳旁风。不要做这样的人。


    梅尔彻解释说：“之所以说这种做法有问题，是因为这是一种失衡的对话。别人会认为你没有自知之明。”


    此外，你应该认清公司内部的势力范围。不要对同事说某个人的坏话，因为你永远不知道每个人幕后效忠于谁。要清楚官方和非官方的组织结构，这样你才不会像哥们一样对老板说话，也不会像对待上司一样对待与自己同级的同事。

Being oblivious to others

    The workplace is filled with poor listeners. These people blather on during meetings and calls, failing to think of the other person's perspective or to pick up on cues that their messages are falling on deaf ears. Please don't be one of them.


    "The reason this is so problematic is that it's an imbalanced conversation," Melcher explains. "The other person is starting to conclude that you don't have any self-awareness."


    You should also be aware of the lines of power in your organization. Don't bad-mouth someone to a colleague because you never know who has behind-the-scenes loyalties. Be aware of the official -- and the unofficial -- organizational chart so you don't end up speaking to your boss like a buddy or to your peers like a supervisor.

Q168

《初为领导者》（First-Time Leader）一书的作者乔治•布拉特认为：“像对待同事一样对待老板是一种失礼的行为。而像对待下属一样对待同事同样如此。”例如，如果你领导的团队中，有人并不是你的直接下属，他们与你级别相同；你不能指望对他们指手画脚。相反，你要通过设定共同的目标，赢得他们的配合。


    布拉特建议：“如果有人向你介绍团队中的成员情况，要问一下这些人的上司是谁，也要问一下他们暗中向谁汇报工作。”例如，一家公司的新任总裁技术上负责营销与业务开发，可结果这家业务开发部门的负责人却是公司的联合创始人之一、同时也是另外一名创始人、公司首席执行官的好朋友。


    布拉特说：“如果你的下属中有一位是公司的创始人，那他就是你的老板！”


    不要浪费别人的时间，即便是用很不起眼的方式。如果你邀请别人进行一次社交会面，之前一定要充分调查一下对方和他的公司，针对会话内容制定一个议程，至少要打个腹稿。
"Treating your boss like a peer is a faux pas. Treating a peer like a subordinate is a faux pas," says George Bradt, author of the forthcoming book First-Time Leader. For instance, if you're leading a team that includes people who aren't your direct reports, they are your peers; you can't expect to order them around. Rather, you need to win their cooperation by setting mutual goals.


    "When somebody tells you [the names of people on] your team, ask about who they report to, and ask about the shadow reporting," Bradt advises. For instance, one new company president was technically in charge of marketing and business development, but it turned out that the head of business development was a company founder and best friends with the chief executive, another founder.


    "You've got a guy working for you who started the company? He's your boss!" Bradt says.


    Don't waste people's time, even in small ways. If you ask for a networking meeting, arrive having researched the person and his organization. Have an agenda, even if it's just in your mind, to give the conversation structure.